Thursday, April 20, 2017

I'm Back!

After 2 weeks of not being able to get on this site, I am finally back. It is super confusing when your credit card needs to be updated... It could definitely be just me but it was WAYYYY more difficult than it probably should have been.

BUT I'M BACK!

I've been spending a lot of my time thinking about how hard I am on myself. MOST of the time, I am thinking of something I can do better, or maybe something that I am NOT doing for whatever reason. 

One of the main things I've been pretty much obsessing about the last 2 years is food. I'm not heavy (I really don't like the word "fat"), I'm not skinny, I'm not super athletic anymore, I think I pretty much fall in the curvy, little chubby box. For the most part I really like how I look and actually am appreciative of how I look. That being said, I do know that I need to work on the type of food I eat and focus on eating better food for my body. Not only that, but losing 20-25 lbs more would be pretty awesome. 

I did a solid year of Weight Watchers and lost about 25-30 lbs, then of course some weight started creeping back on but i have kept off a solid 15-20 over the last 2 years and I am proud of that. I really just got TIRED of tracking my food (even though it did seem to work for me) and worrying if I eat something will I see it on the scale on weigh-in days. I want to focus on my health overall and the includes more veggies, fruits, more protein and whole fat foods. A lot of "diets" want you to give up sugar. Trust me when I tell you I have heard all of the reasons to not eat sugar (AKA "43 Reasons Why Sugar is Worse That Crack, etc)... sorry guys, I heart dessert and don't think I will be quitting it. 

However, I know that less will be not only better for me health, but will help overall with my waist line. 

Basically I want to keep up with cooking most of my meals, which I already do, and learned to do while I was on Weight Watchers, and stocking the fridge with "good for you" foods. I want to enjoy going out when we do, and enjoy my desserts and wine on occasion and feel like I can do so, if I am good most of the other times. 

Right now I am focusing on lowering my carb intake, I have had almost ZERO bread and pasta in the last 2 weeks and a very minimal amount of potatoes (one of my favorites) and I have been feeling pretty good about this and surprisingly have not really missed bread or pasta... Potatoes... another story... but I'm getting through. 

Diet is not the only thing I am hard on myself about. 

I am hard on myself when it comes to how I am with other people, mainly people I care about. 

I am definitely an introvert but when I do get out and about, especially with people I love, I love to do it and have a great time. That being said, planning times to do that is important to me because HONESTLY my happy place is at home relaxing by myself. I know that it's good for me to get out and about, I seriously have some of the best people in my life... sometimes I think and hope that these people know that the reason I say "no" to things sometimes is because it is time to take care of Casey. I definitely don't say "no" all the time.. I know the importance of saying "yes" and have even pushed myself to say "yes" more often. 

I guess sometimes I wish i just was more of an extrovert, more social, etc. 

But once again, I really think it's time that I learn to be thankful for HOW I am and go with it. There is nothing wrong with picking certain things to work on. I don't think it would be good if I stopped trying to be better... But I would like to focus more on how to be a better ME, not try to change who I am.

So, this was probably the most personal post yet, but  probably not the last. I just wanted to share with you guys.

:)

2 comments:

  1. I think you're beautiful and your body is amazing!

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  2. "I would like to focus more on how to be a better ME, not try to change who I am." Love this!!

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